The Early Years - Growing up on the Farm
               

Early childhood experiences, psychologists tell us, profoundly influence and help to form a person’s basic personality.  With the formative episodes that occurred in Kasandra's life it’s not hard to see that at a tender age she learned how precious animals were and how dependent they were on humans for their very survival.  When the young girl would find a nest of abandoned baby mice she would carefully bundle them up and bring them home.  Her mother would show her how to make them little beds out of old-fashioned sliding match boxes filled with bits of cotton batting or wool and carefully bed them down with the boxes slightly open so they could get air.

The neighbor on the adjacent farm once brought over a litter of 7 dying newborn piglets suffering from dehydration and starvation.  He told the family that for some reason the mother pig refused to let them nurse and their days seemed numbered.  Kasandra watched and helped her mother warm up some wool blankets by the potbelly stove.  Making warm comfortable beds for the piglets in the house by the stove, they fed each a drop of castor or mineral oil from an eyedropper to help stop their diarrhea. Over the next days, with bottle-feeding, tender loving care and a watchful eye they were able to save 5 of the piglets.
 
Kasandra even came to appreciate skunks, the animal that city folk and even most farmers purposely avoid.  Occasionally a wayward skunk would wander into the open porch of the family home and decide to homestead in behind some 5-gallon pails.  Her mother taught her never to be alarmed at them, but to move slowly, non-threateningly and get the skunk’s hind legs elevated with a broom handle, as skunks need to have their hind legs firmly planted on the ground in order to spray.  Rather than get a rifle and shoot it, which was the common rural practice, what they did next was very interesting.  Carefully they picked up the captured, stink-disabled animal by the tail and carried it far away from the house, setting it down with it’s behind facing the opposite direction of course.  The next thing to do was quite obvious;…run like hell.
With Kasandra’s growing love for animals, each one seemed a potential pet, and she noticed that they sensed when they were in safe human company.  It was sometimes difficult for her with the farm animals because she knew that eventually each would have to be butchered or sold in order for the family to live.  Focusing on the wild animals surrounding their farm, she would carefully observe to learn about them, touch and pet them (when they allowed it), talk to them, sing to them, even give them lectures and preach to them.  Therefore, it was no surprise that she made a pet of a baby screech owl that had fallen from its nest and was left abandoned.  This little white-faced fellow she called “Mack” and would feed him mice and carry him around on a stick, on which he sat proudly perched. Knowing Kasandra, she probably felt sorry for the mice, but she also knew they were part of an owl’s natural diet.  Mack, being a wise owl to know this was a good thing, remained and lived with her on the farm for about 4 years. 


Another special pet of those early farm years included a little goat named “Distlefink”.  The fond memories she had of Distlefink and the other goats on the farm left a lasting impression, and throughout her life she loved to discuss the subject of goats.   Back on the farm she enjoyed the distinct personality goats had, and she was amazed at their curiosity and remarkable intelligence.  With the cows, the family would have to go outside no matter how bad the weather and round them up to get them in the barn to milk.  Kasandra enjoyed how goats, because of their curiosity, love of human attention and dislike for rain or snow, would simply walk into the family porch to get out of bad weather, climb up on the stool and wait to be milked.  A goat’s innate sure-footedness and ability to climb and walk along the top of the farm’s narrow board fence Kasandra found humorous.  And even more hilarious was when a neighbor would stop by to show off a new car he’d just bought. While his back was turned, Kasandra and her sisters would smile and watch, as the shiny new vehicle would soon have goats on the roof, hood and trunk standing proud as if they’d just conquered Everest. 


Having been born with stomach and digestive problems and having an allergy to cow milk, she used goat milk all her life (especially enjoying it on cereal and in coffee) and oftentimes suggested its use to families who had newborns with similar digestive difficulties.  Possessing such an appreciation of animals (and having a mischievous side as well) Kasandra even enjoyed pretending to be animals.  One day Kasandra and her oldest sister (who were about 3 and 4 years old respectively) decided they were going to be pigs.  And what do pigs like to do besides eat?  Well, what else?  Roll in the mud, of course!  Dressed in their clean, white cotton little girl dresses made by their mother, they went outside and spied some deep ruts in the road that were conveniently filled from a previous rainfall.  Some time later, coming back in the house with torn dresses and covered head to toe with mud, they attempted to smile, with the mud running down their hair, faces and teeth.  Any busy, tired, hard working mother trying to run a farm (while her husband was miles away earning extra money building prairie Pool elevators) would naturally be upset by a prank like this.  Taking them outside she began a disciplinary lecture and attempted to paddle their backsides, only to find she was hitting 4 inches of heavy, thick, caked on mud that was simply insulating the girls bottoms and spattering off all over her with each swat.  It wasn’t long before all three of them looked like pigs that just came from a mud bath and there was nothing left from them all to do but howl with laughter at the silliness of all that had just transpired. 

    

To digress for a moment, where animals are concerned, these early experiences made Kasandra not unlike “Elli-Mae Clampet” of the popular 60’s TV show “The Beverly Hillbillies” with all her "critters".  This writer can attest to that, as he saw her over the period 29 years raising dogs, cats, rabbits, pet goats and Frizzle chickens and probably a few other members of the wild kingdom since forgotten.  At 50+ years of age it was not uncommon to proudly bring into her rented country house her 3 African pigmy goats Distlefink II, Baerley and Whisper.  Initially in 1995, she was just going to have one little barn with one tiny goat named Distlefink, in memory of her childhood pet.   But with her concern for Distlefink’s loneliness (and with the help of a local goat breeder and friend) one goat became two, two became three, three became four, and so on.  Then, with the help of her friends, two more tiny barns were erected.  And with the addition of another 200’ feet of fencing, there were eventually a grand total of 12 goats on the premises.  Not bad for someone who just wanted one goat.  

Other pets that she always wanted but never had the opportunity to own included a Vietnamese pot bellied pig, a miniature pony, a miniature collie, a hairless dog and a chimpanzee that she wanted to name Clarence and dress up in coveralls.  Her all time favorite and most recent pet was a beautiful Sphinx cat (a hairless breed) named “Vincent”, born 1995. 

As mentioned previously, Kasandra’s father was often away in her early years traveling with work crews building Saskatchewan Pool elevators, although he also had a definite influence in her life.  In addition to his Norwegian sense of humor, he taught her a very simple, yet profound lesson as she got older.  What was this lesson?  She could do anything she put her mind to and succeed, if she would believe in herself and her God given gifts.  Privately, he once confided to her that the traditionally accepted woman’s role would likely be a mould that she would need to break out of in order to flourish.  Somehow he knew that she needed to be free.  Kasandra often spoke fondly of all these and other memories and was well aware of the strong, positive influence they had on her life. 

The healing aspects of plants also intrigued Kasandra.  Some of this influence came from her maternal grandmother who was a mid-wife, the local undertaker and a practitioner of natural medicine.  Her grandmother would be considered a qualified, self-taught herbalist by today’s standards.  People from miles around would come to her for effective remedies to their ailments.  Years later, acknowledging her grandmother’s abilities, Kasandra also took an active interest in the natural healing qualities found in nature, used them for herself and suggested their use to others. 

Frail Health 

Unfortunately, frail health was something Kasandra was born with and it would be a constant source of struggle that held her back in some ways.  It was responsible for putting her in the hospital for examination, treatment or surgery many times over the course of her life.   

At the young age of 10 she almost died in hospital from bowel complications, but was believed to have been saved by the miracle of prayer when all medical hope was lost.  The family was poor and unable to afford a round-the-clock private nurse, which they were told she should have.  Fortunately, this was an old-fashioned hospital run by the nuns.  One little nun told the family that if they could at least find a way to afford a private nurse during the daytime, she would sit by Kasandra’s bed and watch her through the nights at no cost.  The appreciative family gratefully accepted this offer.  When Kasandra revived as the result of what can only be described as a miracle, and 5 blood transfusions of a rare type donated by a local priest, the little watchful nun, Sister Mary Adele, became a great example for her and a source of spiritual strength and friendship.  Not to mention the jovial, blood-donating priest, Father Necrow, who ever afterward referred to Kasandra as his “sister” because of the transfusions.  He became a regular visitor to the family farm and anytime thereon if Kasandra was sick or even had a pimple on her face, Father Necrow would jokingly say to her, "Oh, that's just our two different bloods fighting each other".  

As Kasandra was recovering at this time in the hospital, Sister Mary would pay frequent visits to her room, cheering her up.  This did much to alleviate the homesickness Kasandra felt.  Years later Kasandra related the story of how on one of those days when she was missing her family and feeling sorry for herself, Sister Mary appeared in the doorway with an armload of clean diapers that needed to be folded.  Telling Kasandra that she needed help, it wasn’t long before Kasandra was distracted from her homesick feelings and was now thinking about how important she was that Sister needed her help and that the babies in the hospital would have nice, soft, freshly folded diapers to wear.  

A Life Altering Experience   
               

To the end of her life Kasandra believed that during her coma in this hospital stay she must have clinically died for a period of time.  She confided to only a few during her lifetime how she vividly remembers waking up, painless in another realm and seeing a bright white light, she began to move toward it; a common experience described by others who have been clinically dead and revived.  While in this state she felt it wasn’t yet her time to depart; that there was something more she was supposed to do with her life.  She maintained that this experience changed her deeply.  Carrying that memory throughout her life, she told those closest to her that she wasn’t afraid to die because of that rare glimpse of what it’s like on the other side; a glimpse that she was given on one more occasion in 2002 during another close call in hospital.  She believed that the death of someone or something close to us could teach us some of our most profound lessons, often saying, “Let death be your advisor”. 

From those early experiences in that little country Catholic hospital, it’s no wonder that the Catholic Church left such a profound influence on Kasandra and her family, and that Sister Mary Adele became someone she often spoke of as one of the great teachers of her early life. 

Some Amazing Abilities and a Dichotomy 
      

Although young Kasandra performed well scholastically, she had a nagging thought that the lessons school had to offer, although valuable, were very limited in scope and the real school was LIFE itself, as directed by the Divine from within.  For her there was a spiritual connection to everything and she worked hard to maintain and develop that attitude and teach it to others throughout her life.  As a result, she nurtured a keen 6th sense, which gave her direction, the uncanny ability to sense things before they happened and the talent to see the auric, magnetic field around plants, animals and people. 
 
Over the years many people referred to her as “psychic”, although this term doesn’t do her justice.  She was something so much more than that.  Her abilities made her more of a “mystic”, somewhat like a St. Francis of Assisi. Although in many ways she was a shy, reluctant mystic.  Through her life she liked to steer away from the limelight and preferred to live inconspicuously in semi-solitude.  Although she loved to be with people at times, she was not egotistical for attention, needing to be more reclusive than most in order to spiritually and emotionally feed herself.

Her life was such an incredible dichotomy.  Although physically weak and somewhat emotionally scarred, having to deal with bad nerves from acute posttraumatic stress which affected her moods and behavior (causing others to sometimes judge and misunderstand her), she was indeed a spiritual giant nevertheless.  But most would never suspect this rarefied eminence on first meeting her, unless they were exceedingly perceptive.  Some recognized it.  Most didn’t.  I think Kasandra liked it that way, as she never wished to be a circus sideshow.   

               

The wounded aspect of her personality was something she didn’t always like about herself because it sometimes interfered with developing close personal relationships.  This was a constant struggle although she worked extremely hard all her life to heal it, and to some degree suceeded. 

Not wishing to flaunt her mystical abilities, there was a child like simplicity about her such that she would even be amazed at the power and information that would come through her and the experiences she would have.  At those times she would feel the need to lock herself away in private and spend time in prayer and meditation trying to absorb what had just happened.

She made many startling predictions for people regarding personal and world events.  Some didn’t appear to be accurate while others were misinterpreted, and some don’t yet appear to have transpired; although when it really counted, she always hit it “bang on”.   When this information would come to her she would pray and experience herself as a vessel that was simply receiving, all the while maintaining that it was a gift from God and that, because of her own humanness, she was not beyond sometimes misinterpreting it herself.

               

Once a vibrant active attendee to a fundamentalist church, she was asked by the minister to give a talk to the congregation the following Sunday evening.  Nervously, not having a clue what to speak on (or what to wear for that matter), she spent days in thought and prayer, arriving on the designated day to a filled to capacity audience at this well established church.  She wore a beautiful, white Indian sari trimmed with sparkling, gold sequence.  Being present on this occasion, I have to say Kasandra resembled an angel up there at the podium and her unexpected garb (thought to be pagan by some) initially created a bit of a quiet stir.  But it wasn’t long before the crowd was intent on listening to what she came to say.  Her words were strong and powerful yet concerned and caring.  I couldn’t help but notice the Divine sincerity and determination that seemed to exude from her.  Frankly speaking, she seemed to almost imperceptibly glow.  But she closed her talk with a statement that startled the entire congregation.  She said, 

“Unless this church gets their house in order, practices forgiveness and works at resolving the divisions that exist within, … it will not exist in another years time.” 

Needless to say the impact of this statement hit some hard, and in turn they approached the podium at the end of the service for the laying on of hands by this white, glowing charismatic lady.  Others, although polite, shunned her, not having much to do with her in the days and weeks that followed.  Getting tired of being snubbed and feeling as though it was time to shake the dust off her feet and move on, Kasandra stopped attending this church.  It was about one year later the membership had disbanded and scattered to other local congregations and the church building and property went up for sale, soon becoming a Tai food restaurant.
 
Many accurate personal predictions and advice she gave to me where employment opportunities were concerned.  At those times when I was unemployed and going from company to company with my resume, only to have door after door close in my face, Kasandra never seemed concerned.  She would say, "Don't worry, is going to phone you with a job offer".  Although I would generally think to myself "Yah, sure lady", it was usually just days later that the predicted phone call would come. 

Most of the predictions she made weren't stated as official grand proclamations.  On the contrary, she announced them quite informally with much innocence, almost as an offhanded remark. For example, when she told me about a job offer coming through she would simply be sitting in her rocking chair looking at a magazine, or standing pressing clothes at her ironing board. You could miss them if you weren't paying attention because they could be mixed in with regular conversation.

               

This intuition had a very economical, practical side to it because she could usually "sniff out" crash sales when she wanted to go shopping.  It was quite amusing at times, since she rarely needed to look at sale flyers or see adds on TV to find the best deal.  She hardly ever watched TV for that matter.  Instead she would say to me,  "Lets drive over to (store name)", or "Let's phone (store name)".  It was not uncommon for her to quickly track down what she was looking for in a bin as an unadvertised "in store special" or a "reduced to clear" item.  We didn't always know that we had gotten the best deal at the time until later when we found out what the other stores were charging for the same item. 

An amazing episode occurred with her in a Catholic Church.  Mass had ended and the priest and congregation had left.  Kasandra, with a friend, quietly stayed back and remained kneeling in prayer.  After a long period of silence her friend couldn’t help but notice that Kasandra looked startled as she stared toward the altar at the front of the church.  Kasandra turned to him and whispered, “Do you see that?”  Glancing in the same direction, her friend whispered that he saw nothing.  Seconds later, not turning her gaze from the front of the church she asked again, “Don’t you see that?” to which her friend again responded that he didn’t.  What followed profoundly affected her friend each and every time he recalls it.  He saw Kasandra fold her hands, close her eyes and bow her head.  Then he witnessed a pair of hands, palms facing downward as if in blessing, appear only inches away from the top of her head.  These large masculine hands appeared to be neither fully solid nor transparent, although translucent and somewhat glowing complete with long sleeves of a heavy rough looking fabric, beige in color.  Some of her experiences were too precious to share and I don’t know that Kasandra ever spoke of this incident with anyone other than the friend she was there with, while her friend told only a select few over the years. 

This same friend always knew there was something special about Kasandra but he had trouble putting his finger on what made her different.  Once when walking with Kasandra on a busy city street, he quickly crossed at an intersection ahead of her and glancing around at the individuals who were busily walking past him, his vision suddenly seemed to make an unexplainable shift.  For a brief moment in time he could see over top of the heart area of each of these people what resembled a tiny flame similar to that of a flickering candle.  Somewhat surprised, he turned and glanced back at Kasandra only to see over top of her entire mid section a circular formation of a glowing white light.  Shaking his head in wonder he felt he’d just been given a fleeting glimpse of the state of her spiritual attainment. 

There were times she exuded a strong healing energy through her hands, of which I can personally attest to after experiencing an instant healing from her on more than one occasion.  Kasandra never claimed ownership nor made a big deal of this or any of her other mystical abilities, always remembering from where they came and that she was simply a vehicle, sometimes doubting and often questioning why she had been given them.

The Unexplainable Ball Bearing Mystery 
                 

The following is an amazing incident that is difficult to put into words without sounding undeniably strange, but the fact that this event took place (and is documented) certainly deserves mention.  In 1981 Kasandra’s rare abilities were once noted in a university MA thesis on the subject of parapsychology.  The writer/researcher reported the following in his thesis: 

(Editor’s note: At this period in Kasandra’s life her name was Angelique Delaney, therefore she is referred to as such below) 

“Investigator’s Note:
I had a personal experience which places me in something of a dilemma: to report the experience at the risk of undermining my credibility as a researcher or, on the other hand, to leave out an experience so directly relevant to the thesis at hand.   
 
In the summer of 1981, I accepted employment, which put me near some heavy machinery.  By that time I had known Mrs. Delaney for six months and had developed a friendship with her through our numerous discussions.  Since I was to be working out of town, she said she would regularly visit me OOB (i.e. out of body) and record these times so that I might confirm them if  “I was aware of her presence”.  Often I thought there was someone standing by me, yet no one was physically present.  I at first treated these experiences as resulting from my imagination, though well over half of these were confirmed when I compared my records with Mrs. Delaney’s. 

One day a steel ball bearing, 3mm in diameter, fell from part of the machinery.  I picked it up and held it in the fist of my left hand.  At the same time I was keenly aware of  “a presence” beside me.  I felt as though something had struck my left fist.  I opened my hand and saw that the ball bearing was in two pieces.  I was amazed.  In my thoughts, I said, “Angelique, if you did this, I’d like you to do it again”.  Again I felt the same impact, and I opened my hand to discover that one of the halves was now split in two pieces.  I still have the broken ball bearing in my possession." 

(Editor’s note: There were 2 separate independent investigations done on the ball bearing under electron microscopes by research engineers experienced in the examination of parts of mechanical equipment. The findings of this first report are quoted below) 

“Physical examination was done using a microscope with the magnification in the order of 200 to 800.   
              The three pieces when assembled appeared thus:

 

There were no obvious markings which would indicate what caused the bearing to split into three units.  

I have been examining parts of equipment (eg,) bearings of all types, gears, pistons and etc., for thirty years.  Never have I seen a bearing split symmetrically.  At this point, I have no explanation as to why the bearing broke into three pieces as submitted.” 

(Editor’s note: The findings of a second independent report by 3 engineers in research and development are quoted below) 

            “…an examination of a fractured ball bearing was conducted…the following comments may be relevant. 
1.      No sign of a long service fatigue fracture such as striations or corrosion.
2.      There were no dents, scratches or loss of flakes on the surface, which would have suggested that the ball was subjected to impact stress before it fractured.
3.      The fracture surface examination did not reveal the existence of inclusions, porosity, voids or any sign manufacturing defects.
4.      The fracture surface did not show the classical feature associated with component overloading, such as, pattern on the fracture surface to show the direction of fracture propagation.
5.      Based on the above, the ball seemed to have been overloaded in a non classical manner, which has led to a material decohesion.” 

When Kasandra was later interviewed by the writer of the thesis and asked what her own experience was at the time the ball bearing split, her only reply was, 

"I was with God and I asked God, in the ball bearing, to show you the power of God." 

(Editor's note: It has been well documented in both eastern and western cultures that when people function from an elevated state of consciousness, at that moment their own will becomes aligned with the Divine will and the Divine will respond to their request.  This type of occurrence we often refer to as a "miracle" because it's beyond our human comprehension). 

Kasandra was always very humble about any part she may have played in this event and never wished to discuss it with anyone, not wanting the attention and the obvious positive or negative publicity, challenges and skeptical attacks on her that would have likely resulted.  Never the less, the aforementioned documentation was part of the thesis that awarded the graduating research student his MA in Psychology.

Love of the Arts … Especially Opera   
               

A dedication to Kasandra Fox could never be complete without mentioning her love of classical music and in particular, opera.  For the past decade, roughly, she was a season ticket holder with the Vancouver Opera and owned an extensive collection of opera videos.  She felt very fortunate to have been able to see in concert both Jose Carreras and Luciano Pavaroti on separate occasions; however, it was her big dream to see all of the 3 tenors together on stage.  That dream came true at a gala performance one New Years Eve at BC Place Stadium in Vancouver.
 
Pavaroti’s trademark, Nessun Dorma from the Italian opera Turandot by Puccini, had to be one of Kasandra’s favorite arias and held special significance for her with the climatic, triumphant conclusion…  

Dilegua, o notte! Tramontate, stelle!
Tramontate, stelle! All'alba vincerò!
Vincerò! Vincerò! 
(Translation)
Disperse, o night! Set, you stars!
Set, you stars! With the dawn I will win!
I'll win! I'll win! 

These famous operatic lines became in some ways the theme aria for her own life.  When the challenges and struggles of life seemed too much to bear and when there seemed to be more darkness than light, she would sit, sometimes with tears running down her face, praying and listening to a recording of Pavaroti singing this aria.  This precious ritual would inevitably strengthen and encourage her.

Other types of music that also gave her pleasure included blues, North American folk, sacred and some new age.  Although she wasn’t a big country music fan, she adored and admired the late, legendary Johnny Cash; his trials, tribulations and the sincerity of his songs.

Idiosyncrasies and Sense of Humour   
              

Good humor was for her a strong personality trait, and although she wasn’t adept at remembering jokes that were told to her, she could always find something funny in daily life that would give her reason to laugh and smile.  She used to say things like, “God sure must have a good sense of humor… he created us”.  When perplexed people would ask what she meant, her response was something like, “Well have YOU taken a good look in the mirror lately?”   

She possessed the ability to be able see some humor in most anything and appreciated the humor others saw as well.  At a social gathering of church members she was engaged in a deep discussion with a woman about whether or not Jesus had a sense of humor.  Kasandra stance was that he most certainly did.  The woman who portrayed Jesus as always serious (preoccupied with raising the dead, scolding Pharisees, changing water into wine and dumping money changers' tables) disagreed with her and said, “Oh come on, Jesus never laughed.”  A light-hearted Franciscan priest who was in earshot turned to the woman and said, “Don’t ever let his mother hear you say that.”  Needless to say, laughter resulted with Kasandra taking the lead and as for the discussion,… well, there was no need for it to continue.

The love of playing practical jokes on family and friends she often attributed to the Norwegian in her.  This Scandinavian heritage she expressed in various ways.  One was her love of trolls.  She proudly displayed 4 trolls in her apartment and gave each of them a name; Helga, Horace, (the third I can’t remember) and Turolf.  The first three were small and remained peering out from a corner living room shelf, while the smiling, bearded Turolf, who was about 24” tall including the peak of his bright red felt hat, proudly stood on the floor of her apartment close to the living room phone.  In a childlike way, she felt that these trolls sort of watched over the apartment.  There were times when Kasandra’s friends Stevhan and Jeff would help clean her apartment, and woe to the guy that would pick up Turolf by the hat to clean the floor beneath his boots.  Emphatically she would proclaim,  

“Don’t ever pick Turolf up by the hat!  How would you like to be treated that way?  Pick him up by the arms then set him down gently afterward.  Treat a troll with respect!” 

Okay, … so they did, … although, when she wasn’t looking, Turolf’s hat remained a convenient method of swift, temporary transport. 

The humor she possessed allowed her to laugh at herself and her own human folly.  Once when one of her friends was at her home and they were getting ready to go out, Kasandra appeared to be frustrated, going from room to room evidently trying to locate something of importance.  Concerned and unable to contain himself any longer, her friend asked what she was looking for, to which she approached him, looked him in the eyes and replied, 

“I can’t find my damn glasses and I just had them before you got here.  Can you help me find them?” 

Her friend, tactfully holding back his laughter, (and wondering where her intuition suddenly went) glanced at a pair of glasses that were sitting firmly on the crown of her head.  There was, of course, a lot of belly laughter from the both of them when he revealed to her the whereabouts of the “lost” glasses.

Vincent - the cat   
               

Her beloved sphinx cat, Vincent, was an object of her deepest affection.   He had the run of her home and was treated more like a human than a pet.  Most cats are content to have one single rumpled up bed, but Vincent had three separate beds strategically located throughout the apartment and Kasandra lovingly made up each on a daily basis.  One of Vincent’s beds was on a homemade oval shaped mattress in a basket placed on the trunk beside Kasandra’s bed.  Another was a bunched up quilt on her meditation-prayer seat.  And the last was a bunched up quilt on the foot of her own bed.  If that’s not extreme enough, each bed had a heating pad that was always turned on at low heat for Vincent’s hairless, feline comfort.  Depending on his mood and whether or not he wanted to be close to Kasandra, Vincent had a good choice of where he would bed down for the night, ... or for the morning, …or for the day, …or afternoon. 

Kasandra’s apartment had a full bathroom, which was definitely hers and housed a vast assortment of skin and hair care products, perfumes, lotions, dusting powders, make-up, lipsticks, nail polishes and other “girlie” items.  Some would say she kept enough on hand to supply a small retail outlet.  Besides, “I don’t want to run out”.  The apartment also contained a half bath; this she referred to as “Vincent’s bathroom”, which contained his litter box beside the human toilet and his drinking mug (not bowl) always filled to the brim with distilled water and placed on the vanity beside the sink.  One of Kasandra’s apartment rules was that Vincent’s bathroom door was always to remain open because “Vincent gets upset if the door’s closed”.  On many occasions over the years Stevhan or Jeff could be seen, with door wide open, answering nature’s call, while the curious Vincent would sit in the doorway like the Egyptian sphinx watching the proceedings.  Sometimes he would even join in, furiously scattering dust and litter about the bathroom.  He particularly liked to do this shortly after the bathroom floor was cleaned, for some reason. 

At Christmas time Kasandra would have friends over with a table setting for each, including a setting for Vincent, of course.  He was provided with the tall captain’s chair so that his little face could reach his own plate (not bowl) of mashed potato, turkey, dressing and gravy on the dining table.  Sometimes Vincent would finish eating first, after which he needed to sample a few items off “mom’s” or the guests’ plates, just in case they might have something better than what he had.   The guests never minded this, as Vincent being hairless was bathed daily, much to his dismay.  The truth is, Vincent was probably more sanitary than the invited company. 

Kasandra knew this behavior described above was a little off the wall, to say the least, but what was so admirable is that she made no apology for it and could uproariously laugh about it with her friends anytime they pointed it out.  And besides, one couldn’t help but love her and the adorable little Vincent, who she treated so much like a human, he most likely believed he was.

Multi-Gifted and Multi-Talented 
        

The entireties of Kasandra’s gifts to this world are many.  A writer, an artist, photographer, nutritionist, a great cook, personal counselor, mystic, maker of homemade crafts, lover of nature, and a great humanitarian; she had a big heart for all of God’s creatures.  As a foster parent she gave many abandoned, abused and deprived children a fresh start at life in a loving, nurturing environment, raising them along with her own son, who would help his mother and treat them as his own brothers and sisters.  As a gifted writer under the name of Florence Goodlad, she worked on the task force that developed and wrote the Life Skills program that is still used in various provinces across the country.  A charismatic public speaker over the years, Kasandra gave public talks and seminars on self-help topics such as, spiritual living, prayer and meditation, color therapy, art therapy, the art of creative living, child rearing, and nutrition.
   
At one point in time a Franciscan priest, recognizing her devotional sincerity and creative ability to motivate people, asked her to be the director of a local fraternity of the Secular Franciscan Order.  That's why some of the readers may have seen her sometimes sign "SFO" after her name.

(Editor's historic note: The various Franciscan Orders [the monastic and the secular] were founded by St. Francis of Assisi in the early part of the 13th century.  The Secular Franciscan Order embraces devout persons of both sexes living in the world, married or single, who vow to follow a sacred rule of Christian life based on the example of St. Francis.  Francis showed by his own life that one could walk in the footsteps of Christ and take his or her spiritual journey to a deeper profession of faith.  The Order includes not only members who form part of logical fraternities, but also isolated tertiaries, hermits, pilgrims, etc.)

The Art of Creative Living

Although not holding much in the way of educational degrees, the compiled wisdom Kasandra was able to glean from her experiences, struggles and the creative application of the lessons learned from these to daily life automatically gave her an honorary “Doctorate of Philosophy in Creative Life”.  If there was, in reality, such a degree, no was more deserving of it.  Life unfortunately doesn't give such degrees, but as my friend's mother often says, "It gives you stars in heaven". 
 
To Kasandra, everyday living was an art and she lived life artistically right down to how she dressed, applied her makeup and presented herself to the world.  In her private consultations she stressed to women the importance of expressing the gift of their God given femininity by dressing up, putting on some jewelry, and taking the time to do their hair, skin care and makeup, treating it all as a spiritual meditation.  She always maintained that women are naturally more fulfilled, self-assured and assertive when they take the time to nurture themselves in that way. 
 
Her writings, most of which she never had the chance to get published, include poetry, numerous journals, short stories and healing suggestions for survivors of past abuse to rebuild their lives in the present.  The drawings, paintings, collages and sketches Kasandra created reflect the depth, the beauty and the harsh realities of life and their effect on us.

There were times when people would admit to her that they envied her high degree of creativity and wished they had it for themselves.  Her responses would vary, although I had overheard her joke,

"Don't waste your time envying what I have.  Life as a creative person isn't easy, because we usually have both feet planted firmly in mid air.  Sometimes I have to stop my mind and start washing floors just to keep from going crazy".

A Lover of Nature  

As a lover of nature, every flower, plant, rock, feather or tree meant something symbolic to her and she would see God and life’s learning in everything.  She loved growing plants and flowers.  Poppies were one of her favorite flowers right from childhood.  She saw the poppy as a frail yet hearty flower that in one instant could be beaten down to the ground by a heavy rain, yet hours later be standing proud and tall in all it’s beauty basking in the sun.  That’s how she wanted to be and chose to be.  Although the heavy storms of life would sometimes beat her down, she learned the lesson of the poppy and would get back up again and present the inner and outer beauty of herself to the world, basking in the joys of life to the best of her ability.  And a memorable, beautiful flower she was.  Even in her latter years, although frail, she never gave up trying to be like the poppy.  She used to say, 

“If you can’t appreciate nature and animals, you can’t appreciate and know God.” 

Gardening was definitely one of Kasandra favorite pastimes and most plants grew very well for her whether bedding plants or plants she started from the seeds she'd harvested from the previous years growth of flowers or potted trees.  She developed a genuine knack for starting a potted tree from seed, with few failures.  Avocados she loved to eat as well as to make houseplants out of by soaking the pits to stimulate germination and then planting them in fresh soil at the proper time.  If any of you have tried to grow an avocado plant from the pit you know it can be done, but only with a lot of tenderness and patience.  Kasandra's success rate with avocado plants was staggering and there were always a few of various sizes beautifying her living room.  Some grew to 6 feet in height.

Standing on Principle
               

Kasandra had the amazing ability to be able to take the mystique out of philosophical and spiritual principles and explain them in layman terms, often challenging those who simply quoted memorized scripture by saying something like,

“Don’t TALK it so much… LIVE it.  And if you can’t LIVE it…then don’t TALK it.  The world already has enough hypocrites.  Actions speak much louder than words.  If you're busy living your spirituality, you find that it's not necessary to talk about it so much, but people see it in you and will become inspired and motivated by your living example.  However, if you find yourself constantly quoting scripture and telling others how you think they should live, stop and ask yourself, `Who am I trying to convince, me or him?' ” 

She didn’t have a lot of patience with people who were smug about their religion; those who thought that everyone else was wrong unless they believed and belonged to the same path they did.  She knew it was that kind of intolerance that was responsible for much of the present unrest in the world. When people angrily and aggressively came at her quoting scripture, Kasandra could verbally corner them with their own words and send them away with their heads spinning, feeling rather foolish (much like how a Kung Fu master can redirect his attacker’s energy back toward the opponent, thus defeating him).  She was able to do this because she knew energy and how it worked.  This wasn’t done to be mean.  On the contrary, this was one way she effectively challenged people to re-evaluate the shallowness of their lives and become better.  Knowing that this type of person was basically insecure, fearful and hiding behind their religion, she believed that they needed to see how foolish they were before they’d muster the incentive to change.  Kasandra definitely had her special, sometimes abrupt way of helping them along with that process.  It was quite entertaining to watch her in action.  Yet if someone came to her who was sincerely searching, she would in all loving gentleness give him or her all the time and counsel that was needed. 

Having a tremendous tolerance and appreciation for all religions, she advised those that came to her, to embrace the spiritual path of their choice and practice it to the best of their ability and,

“Most importantly,…” she would say, “put God FIRST,…don’t make your RELIGION your God, because God is BIGGER than any church or religion.” 

Her Spirituality - Her Humanness 

As for Kasandra, her own spiritual practices included daily prayer and deep meditation, and she always maintained that her relationship with her Creator was what gave her the daily strength, wisdom, gratitude and joy she needed to function effectively and creatively in the world.  She would constantly talk to God, inwardly or outwardly, throughout the day, making a point to include Him in every activity of her life.  Not pretending to be unlike the rest of us, she also was not beyond "screwing up" and sometimes going through great turmoil to work at correcting herself and the situations she found herself in.

Kasandra had a fervent, devoted love of the Personage, the Divinity and the teachings of Jesus Christ, as well as that of Paramahansa Yogananda.  Yogananda, ahead of his time, came to North America promoting religious tolerance way back in the early1920’s, preaching that at their very core, all religions state the same truths if you look beyond all the dogma and distortions; it’s only the surface customs and expressions that differ.  Even more importantly, he taught that we can learn to experience God personally through the daily practice of meditation, regardless of ones religious affiliation because God isn't Catholic or Protestant or Jewish or Muslim or Hindu or Sikh or Buddhist, or any other religion.  Kasandra could personally relate to these teachings from experience and did her best to live by them.

Some Sayings from Kasandra

In her journals she liked to write down short sayings.  Some are included below and have been directly taken from one of her journals.  It should be noted that she might not have been the original author of some of these, because she also liked to write down the thoughts of others as well, particularly when they struck a meaningful chord with her.  I purposely excluded any that I knew for certain were authored by others.  If I erroneously did include any sayings that were originally by others, my humble apologies to them as well as to Kasandra, as this was unintentional. 

God can do tremendous things through the person who doesn't care who gets the credit. 

The person who asks "why (?)" doesn't really want an explanation; he wants an argument.  
         
Don't fix the blame.  Fix the problem. 

Every good person who goes through bad times develops a greater sensitivity. 

Blessed are those whose dreams are shaped by their hopes, not their hurts. 

It is impossible to have thoughts of resentment, jealousy, anger, hate and ill will - and be HAPPY.
 
People who are highly critical suffer from low self-esteem. 

If you've never had a problem with guilt, your standards have been too low. 

I can live without pleasure, but I can't live in shame.

Have courage.  If you're going to have regrets - regret what you did, not what you didn't do. 

If you find you don't really like someone,… leave.  And leave them in the same condition you found them.  It is not necessary to hurt them to leave. 

Having sex with a child is a punch in the face that lasts a lifetime. 

Having freedom is doing what you like, so long as you don't interfere with the freedom of others. 

A truth peddler is someone who mouths words about freedom. 

In the end, a person must be judged by his actions.  It is futile to go around talking glibly about freedom if one does nothing about it. 

Politeness is thinking of others and their feelings. Young children are primarily interested in themselves; the adult egoist is the man who has never grown up. 

Young children have a natural honesty. 

In the business of our day and life, it may seem like a waste of time to slow down, to stop what we're doing and pray or meditate.  It is no more a waste of time than stopping to put gas in our car when the tank is almost empty. 

A friend is the little toy surprise in the cereal box of life. 

You can easily judge the character of a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him. 

There is no future in the past. 

Vulnerability is not necessarily a time of weakness - rather, it can be seen as a time of new opening to new things, and a moving on. 

You can't get enough of what you don't really want. 

Keep your words nice and soft just in case you have to eat them.

In Conclusion

Kasandra’s original works will be held in trust and published one day for the world to benefit from.  There will be no public funeral. Instead, Kasandra wanted people to remember her as she was when alive; someone who’d never give up, no matter what the obstacle.  We wish her well on her great spiritual life beyond and although sadly missed, we rejoice in the fact that her suffering is now ended. 

Vincent, her beloved Sphinx cat, who is pictured in this web site, was her constant, loyal and loving companion right to the end of her life.  According to her wishes, their ashes have been mixed and spread in some of her favorite spots in nature where she loved to spend time with God and friends.

With her remarkable abilities, you may ask “Why couldn’t or wouldn’t she heal herself?”  This is one of those mysteries that has no simple single answer.  In my own internal struggle to fathom this dilemma I’ve paraphrased below some the thoughts of Paramahansa Yogananda (1893 to 1952) and Sri Ramakrishna (1836 to 1885) to create an overall picture of what I’ve come to understand: 

Occasionally the Lord sends to earth great souls of spiritual advancement.  These are not necessarily as advanced as Avatars, but they do have some of their characteristics.  The Bible described them as prophets.  Sometimes they live very publicly and sometimes very privately.  Sometimes they have bodies that are healthy and robust.  Sometimes they are physically weak and sickly.  Either way, they are spiritual giants and their lives cannot be sufficiently judged by ordinary human standards.  Sometimes they will suffer intense persecution and have to undergo great tribulations. They aren’t necessarily born here remembering who they are and therefore have to go through life, learning the lessons like everyone else.  But the attentive observer will note that there’s something special about them.  The role they play depends on the task they came to do.  Other than some fleeting glimpses, they may not themselves even be fully aware of this role until shortly before they depart.  But they come to teach others through the example of their own lives.  Ramakrishna stated, “They are like big steamships, which not only cross the ocean themselves but carry many passengers to the other shore.” One who is sickly may have come to teach people, through his or her illness, how to care for others who suffer infirmities.  In Kasandra’s own last years of physical suffering she humbly and simply stated to her closest companions,
      
“I often think that I’m here to teach others through my own need.” 

Thank You for Visiting 

Thank you for taking the time to read this web page.  It will remain posted indefinitely, possibly many years and may be edited and revised occasionally.  This page was a pleasure and sometimes a struggle to write.  Although, I’m glad that this dedication is finally completed and available so that others are able to read about my dear friend Kasandra Fox.  

Condolences may be sent to this site where they will be read and made available to family and close friends.  For those wishing to give monetary donations in her memory, please give to either of the organizations below or similar ones of your choice: 

Ishtar Transistion Housing Society
5507 - 208 St, Langley, BC, V3A 2K4

PETA
(People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals)
501 Front St, Norfolk, VA., 23510

I only just remembered now that Kasandra predicted the following in my presence on numerous occasions (even long before the Internet ever existed), 

“After I’m dead and gone, you will write about my life (the serious and the corny) for the world to read.” 

Although I always inwardly doubted I’d ever attempt this task or that it could even have global circulation, I’m now smiling to myself after writing this; … and it’s available worldwide, too.   Hmmm?    Good one, Kasandra !! 

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As Kasandra was a creative and prolific writer, it seems appropriate to conclude this dedication with two of her own written works.

LEARNING
I WALKED ALONG THE GOLDEN SANDS OF TIME
SHOES HELD IN HAND
TO FEEL THE SAND BENEATH MY FEET.
YOUR PRESENCE TOUCHED ME LIKE THE PETALS OF A ROSE
AND STILLED THE CHURNING WATERS OF MY SOUL.
AS YOU TOUCHED, ME DEEP WITHIN
A PEACE I'D LOST, ONCE MORE WAS MINE.
I SAW MY WORLD WITH VISION
NOT WITH SITE.
IN SILENCE AND IN SOLITUDE
I RESTED IN THE SPACE OF LOVE AND PEACE WITHIN.
NO NEED TO THINK OF REASON WHY
I AM.
NO MIND CAN ANALYZE THE HEART OF WOMAN.
I AM A STAR,
A ROSE,
A WEED,
I AM A WOMAN LEARNING TO BE FREE

(c) 1990 Kasandra Fox
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THE CLAN'S PRAYER
KEEP US, GREAT SPIRIT, FROM PETTINESS.
LET US BE THOUGHTFUL IN WORD AND DEED.
HELP US TO PUT AWAY OUR PRETENSE
AND TO REALIZE TRUST IS TO BE EARNED.
HELP US TO BE ABLE TO FACE EACH OTHER IN DEEP TRUST.
WITHOUT FEAR OR SELF-PITY.

LET US BE DONE WITH FAULT FINDING
AND BE QUICK TO FIND THE BEST IN EVERY SITUATION.
GUARD US FROM ILL TEMPER AND HASTY JUDGEMENT.
ENCOURAGE US TO TAKE TIME FOR ALL THINGS;
TO GROW CALM, SINCERE AND GENTLE.

HELP US TO BE SWIFT WITH KIND WORDS.
TEACH US TO NEVER IGNORE, NEVER TO HURT,
NEVER TO TAKE EACH OTHER FOR GRANTED.

ENGRAVE LOVE AND COMPASSION FOR EACH OTHER IN OUR HEARTS.

OM, SHANTI, AMEN.

(c) 1990 Kasandra Fox
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